Turn your face to the sun, and the shadows fall behind you.—Maori Proverb
I love this proverb! I love it because it reminds me, if I ever want even a glimmer of happiness, I have to be willing to face forward. My problems don’t disappear when I do that, however, they don’t stand in the way of my journey anymore either. Facing the sun doesn’t eliminate problems, in fact, it might create some you didn’t know you had. As long as you are willing to stand, face the new day, your shadows, or problems, are well on their way to becoming your history instead of your present.
I tell you this, these days have been hard. It’s true I am not grieving a spouse right now, but rather a relationship with my grandmother. She is alive, but suffering through (and she is suffering) a fast progressing dementia. Every day I get up and face the sun. Every day. If I didn’t, my shadows, would consume me—they would steal who I am and what I believe in. Please understand, for every shadow I place behind me, there is another waiting to cover me.
I am taking each day as it comes because dementia, especially dementia that has progressed three times as fast as what is considered normal, is ever-changing. As soon as I think I have a handle on where she is or have the right level of care for her, she takes another nose dive into the abyss. It would be easy to let this storm wear me down and consume me until I lose myself. I know I can’t let that happen. I have to keep facing the sun.