Day 35: 365 Days of Motivation for Widows

Turn your face to the sun, and the shadows fall behind you.—Maori Proverb

I love this proverb! I love it because it reminds me, if I ever want even a glimmer of happiness, I have to be willing to face forward. My problems don’t disappear when I do that, however, they don’t stand in the way of my journey anymore either. Facing the sun doesn’t eliminate problems, in fact, it might create some you didn’t know you had. As long as you are willing to stand, face the new day, your shadows, or problems, are well on their way to becoming your history instead of your present.

I tell you this, these days have been hard. It’s true I am not grieving a spouse right now, but rather a relationship with my grandmother. She is alive, but suffering through (and she is suffering) a fast progressing dementia. Every day I get up and face the sun. Every day. If I didn’t, my shadows, would consume me—they would steal who I am and what I believe in. Please understand, for every shadow I place behind me, there is another waiting to cover me.

I am taking each day as it comes because dementia, especially dementia that has progressed three times as fast as what is considered normal, is ever-changing. As soon as I think I have a handle on where she is or have the right level of care for her, she takes another nose dive into the abyss. It would be easy to let this storm wear me down and consume me until I lose myself. I know I can’t let that happen.  I have to keep facing the sun.

Author: Sara

My name is Sara and I am a woman with a history and a future. I am a mother of 5 and a Counselor. Being a teen mother and a widow in my mid-twenties has given me plenty of storms to weather. Writing has always been my solace, it's also a passion and a talent. Through my writing I hope to help others weather their storms and create my own path to my dreams.

2 thoughts on “Day 35: 365 Days of Motivation for Widows”

  1. So true. I try to laugh at the moments I can and stay strong when I have to. We had many taking care of her (she had 24 hour care at home) and now she is in a nursing home (with my grandpa), but it still isn’t easy. There is still so much to watch, take care of, and suffer through. I try to take pictures and videos because sooner than later there will be no more chances. Thanks for your words, they resonate.


  2. I remember those days from taking care of my dad. It’s SO hard being a caregiver to someone with dementia. And it teaches you so much about yourself in the process. The best strategy is both the simplest and hardest at the same time and it’s one you already practice….that of just taking it one day at a time. Don’t project ahead and don’t lament the past. On the good days face the sun, let it soak in and take joy in the little things.


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